II: Wherein we discuss the sending off.

Hello!

I suppose since it is past 12 that it means it is officially the day that I depart for the city! However I can't sleep just yet as I still have a few knick-knacks to pack up, though I am not sure in what. I feel tempted to call up a few friends to say good-bye, but I dunno if it might wake them. Claire and Trevor said they would stop by in the morning, for which I am very thankful. I can only imagine what it must be like to go off to a college that is actually far away, where I would not be able to visit on weekends. This whole process I never really got much of the leaving syndrome, except of course now that I am writing about it. I even know that I still really live here, at home, and I can visit whenever I like, yet it is still hard to avoid dramatizing the whole experience as a leaving and irrevocable changing. Maybe it is in a way, but not a drastic one by any means, and nor can it be avoided.

I often used to say that change was the only constant, though of course I did not truly embrace the statement, instead merely superficcially recognizing it as a fancy idea. This is not to suggest that now I have come to absolute terms with the truth of this idea, but all the same I haven't found myself panicing about the changes to come. I even find that I have been able to enjoy present moments more in knowing that soon, although things may be silmilar, they never will be quite the same again. Of course, would that I had this all the time rather than just now. It is funny, all this seems to correlate with my recent choices of movies. Last night we watched To Kill a Mockingbird, which in addition to being freaking awesome, seemed very relevent. I have begun to think that as soon as you can see more and more of the themes of growing up, the more you have in fact grown up. I remember reading it in 6th grade, and I don't remember getting a lot of Jem and Scout's struggle with the pains and predjudices of the world as they begin to realize them. I suppose this means I can now yell at kids to get off my lawn and stop instant messaging on their mobile tele-phone boxes.

Good night, I go to pack!

-Emerson